Updated: Jul 19, 2020
Real friends help you rescue yourself rather than siding with you or increasing your victimization by absorbing your story without pointing to shadow. If you are lucky enough to have a real friend who is a collaborator on the journey then you are less likely to have a plethora of petty tyrants and best enemies. A friend who does not rescue or enable you, and who confronts your blindness with their own vision is like a soul brother or sister who sacrifices your regard for the health of your soul. They are rare, and you may have fired a few because you lacked awareness of their value. If you surround yourself with seducers or “friends” who flatter and compliment you without a balance of healthy reflections you will likely host best enemies and have what I call “road kill”, or friendships you had to sacrifice to continue in a mind made direction at any cost. The way to tell if your friend is real or not is if their words are infused with love, even if they are painful to hear. They will not tease or belittle you, or blame you when pointing to shadow. If someone in your life plays best enemy listen for the true parts of their criticism and realize the meanness is their clumsy and unconscious lack of maturity and heart. A good practice of Shadow Stalking and consciousness training is to be pronoid, that is positive about the messages you get from people. Reflections from others, even if they are polluted with unconsciousness often have little gems hidden in the grime if you are willing to feel for them. If you get good at stalking your own darkness your false friends may fall away, then you may seek out a fierce mentor or guide to companion your path. Pick them well, pick a guide who favors shadow integration and consciousness over “improvement”. Painting Rasher Mark Kavanagh, Reflections.